Every Time
by angelinadarkcorner2.0
Summary: How many times did it take for Usagi and Mamoru to end up together? How many of those times ended in sadness and loss? Why did she have to wish for so much more and miss what was right in front of her?
1. Chapter 1

I do not own Sailor Moon.

Every year, on the night of my birthday, when the guests had left and the confetti slowly danced across the marble, my mother would dim the lights in my bedroom and tell me a story. My hands would hold tightly to the edges of my blankets and I would stare up at her in wonder, her hair catching the moonlight that was pushing through my window.

Every year, before my sixth birthday, I would doze off before she ever got to the end, leaving the ending unremembered and hanging from the climax when I first felt my eyelids become heavy. But I think my mother continued the story with her own needs in mind, never minding that I had fallen asleep.

But on my sixth birthday, I had felt more energy coming from her, and managed to stay awake until the end. Every twist and turn of the story got my legs twitching and my eyes grew wider with every moment.

At the end of the story I looked long and hard at my mother, and for the first time the wonder had fallen to see the weakness in my mother's eyes. She had saved the world countless times and survived such calamity that I thought it impossible for her strength to crack. But at the end of the story, on my sixth birthday, the hand holding mine began to shake, and crystal tears fell from her clear blue eyes.

I felt the need to comfort her but it felt so indecent, that I was seeing the queen and my mother crying silent heavy sobs. So I laid in silence and hoped she had thought I had fallen asleep, shutting my eyes tight against her tears. I didn't want her to know that I had seen her so weak.

Before leaving my bedroom, she placed a soft kiss on each cheek and my forehead, moving my childish pink hair to the side with her warm shaking hands. "I love you my little bunny," she whispered before disappearing behind my door. Leaving me in such a warm bed, but so cold with questions.

The characters of these stories always had the same names, and often the same troubles, clinging to each other and pushing the other away at the same time. There was always a larger force pushing them apart when they only wished to be together, waking up together, and doing small things together. The characters always wanting more simplicity than the universe decided was right for them.

But until my sixth birthday, I thought they always ended up together. I remembered short dreams of happy endings for the characters and waking up knowing that Usagi and Mamoru would be okay in the end, finally achieving that first kiss that meant everything would be okay. But after that night I began to wonder if any of the endings were happy ones.

I sat up all night wondering if these two people so close to my mother and me would ever be happy, and how the universe could be so cruel. Then I became very angry with my mother. Why had she seen it fit to tell me such a horrible story, one that did not end in true love? Was she punishing me, or did she think I was adult enough to hear such things and contradict the reality of true love or even hope?

I love my mother very much but that night I sat up wanting to slap her, wishing that she had never told that story, for now there were questions where there used to be such simplistic ideas.

Before that night all there was in life were my toys and my wish for future bliss, but after that night…

After that night I felt my heart age, and every year after that I fled to my room, after the guests were gone and locked my door, against my mother and her sad stories. For the first few years, she knocked softly for what felt an eternity. But I couldn't let her in, my feet would never walk towards the door. I was too scared.

This is the story my mother told me on my sixth birthday. This is the story that changed our relationship forever.


	2. Chapter 2

The sun seemed to be pulling itself up into Usagi's room with great effort, making a slow time of it. She had stayed up all night waiting for the sight of the sun, excited and terrified for the day that was coming slowly but with certainty. She pulled the blankets quickly to the side and ran to her window flinging it up and smelling the thick morning air. It blew her hair back and she felt new and fresh, even after the hard night that was behind her.

She quickly flung open her bedroom door and ran to the small bathroom that her and 7 other younger people shared. The one small tub was all hers in these wee hours of the morning and she began to fill it with luke warm water, letting the steam rise to her face. The air was so cold in the small wooden bathroom, but she did not care, flinging off her white sleep robe and diving in, scrubbing like mad at all her body parts. This new day would bring a new life.

She climbed out before her skin had begun to prune and wrapped herself in a thin and moth eaten towel, running back to her bedroom with 7 filled beds, and one empty one. She pulled out the box under her bed and flung it open revealing a slim white dress made of silk.

She lifted it to her body and almost cried when she felt it against her skin, her body now perfectly able to fill it out. The last thing left by her mother and she would wear it finally, taking her steps into being a woman grown.

She gathered it up, never letting it reach the floor and pulled it over ankles, up her hips and finally laying to rest over her shoulders. She quickly ran over to the mirror and looked at the long awaited image. She never saw her, but at that moment she felt she was staring at her mother. She rubbed her hands over her arms, cold but never wanting to leave the mirror.

The heavy sound of the front door shutting woke her from her trance and she ran over to her box, withdrawing two hair clips, wrapping her hair into balls and letting the rest of her hair dangle. She wrapped herself in a coat that smelled of gasoline and began to escape the house she had grown up in. Determined not to be seen. The small bag she had packed slung lightly over her shoulders and she softly padded out of the room that her fellow orphans still slept in.

She stopped only to peer into the kitchen, the brown stone room empty of all workers. She had a hope she would not admit to herself and then quickly ran out into the world.

He walked out into the morning, his sac weighing heavy on his back and his hands stiff with dirt. He ripped off his hat and wiped at his head and looked up into the sky that had just recently began to brighten.

When he had walked in to the dig sight it had been pitch black, and now he was escaping 10 hours later, feeling so much pain in his back, he could barely stand. But instead of sitting and waiting for the pain to subside he continued to a house he hadn't been to in years.

He held a small package in his right hand, moving it in between his fingers, gently, as if he held a small glass bird. He thought of her face gently lifting for a small smile when she opened the present.

He had taken too many hours of work and eaten too little so he could afford the small piece in his hand. But as he sped towards the house all the hours and the hunger erased, filling his body with warmth and excitement.

The thirty-minute walk seemed to disappear, Mamoru refusing to look around at the small buildings and businesswomen hiding in the alleyways. This city seemed to hate the morning. Puffing smoke from small chimneys in protest, all the inhabitants receding back into their homes in hopes that they would not have to see the daylight. The smell this morning was particularly pungent. But all went unnoticed with the small package in his right hand.

Then when the squat brick building was in his sights his body stopped, caught by a whole new feeling of fear. He had hoped his exhaustion would make this impossible but still all the questions and doubts came in like too many people pushing into a small room, pushing against each other until the edges of his brain ached.

"I can't do this," he whispered to no one and began to turn his ankle away from the house. But once he faced the opposite way he felt dumb and resolved to turn his head down and keep marching towards his child hood home.

He forced himself to imagine the smile on her face, instead of the look of disgust, sadness or pity that haunted him for the past week. It seemed silly, a man being so conflicted over a trinket wrapped in brown paper, painted pink.

He almost ran into the building before he looked up again, and before he knew it he felt himself inching towards the kitchen entrance, and taking the knob into his hands.

He stood there thinking of their last night in the kitchen together, leaning softly into each other both warm with whiskey in their young bellies. He smelled her breath and felt her hand on his and he felt so happy and free that his fear and anxiety melted into her soft blue eyes.

After he moved out, two years ago, neither of them mentioned that night, one being pulled down by the reality of his situation and the other, he did not know. He knew she wished for a better life than this. She often spoke about tales of being a princess and being swept into a life of soft material and large pearls. And he knew this was not the road for her if he was to tether her down, so from that night on all their encounters were short and tipped with sadness, but no longer.

He had thought of nothing but her as he grew older and Mamoru knew that she was holding something back whenever she saw him in the city. They had both reverted to hiding their feelings with jabs and faux disdain, but this only made him think of her more. Until finally a week ago he resolved to change that, and give her something to look forward to on her sixteenth birthday.

He would give her anything she wanted, if only he could, but an orphan with a dirty job couldn't offer much more than what was in his hand and what was in his heart.

With this thought he turned the handle to the kitchen, opening the door as he heard another one shut. The front door's heavy slam was barely concealed by the person who was leaving and Mamoru's heart sank.

He ran through making a clamor with his work boots against the wooden floor and reached the door just in time to catch the fleeting image of Usagi in her white silk dress.


	3. Chapter 3

Usagi was always told to stay away from the city. "It is filled to the brim with filth and the residents are choking on it," her housemother always said, in a gruff deep voice while she pulled Usagi's hair clean. Sneaking away to the city was hard but easy enough to do it once a month, following closely behind her brave companion.

She hadn't been since he had left, but to pick up a few things for the orphanage, and when she did she kept her head down in mock fear so no one would bother her. She caught glances of businesses and women doing business. This knowledge gave her confidence as she now walked in with her head high and curious to see what it was like in the city for a woman grown.

She was here to find a job, her housemother taught her to bake the finest bread, so if she could only find a bakery that would give her a chance.

The first mile of the city was filled with gambling houses and small food stands, where the people serving seemed covered in an interesting combination of oil and body odor, so she kept going until finally the smell of fresh baked bread filled her nostrils.

She walked over to the small but clean bakery, beige in color and the warmest shop on the strand of buildings. She adjusted her coat and lifted her head high, her shoulders falling back, and walked up boasting. She spoke to the person at the counter. "Hello, I'm here looking for a job and was wondering…" "Are you a whore?" the boy asked bluntly hands still moving his dough around, not even bothering to look up.

Usagi moved back in disgust, "Of course not sir, I would never." She stood, holding her head higher than before and clearly stated, "I bake bread." She smiled at the man and he finally looked up at her to only say two words, "Too bad."

Usagi shook her head not understanding and almost began to walk away when the man shouted at the dough, "You may start work today, my kitchen boy is gone and I need a fresh pair of hands." Usagi quickly turned and smiled sweetly, nodding at the man's proposal.

She entered through a small swinging door that hit her hips and clutched at the first apron she saw. She tied it quickly behind her neck and ripped her jacket off, listening to the soft tinkle of laughter when she revealed her full outfit.

She looked over and the lean blonde boy was chuckling. "What is so funny?" she asked, and he opened his eyes long enough to stare at the gown and began to laugh louder. Usagi felt tears come to her eyes, how dare he make fun of her dress this way. "I'm sorry," he offered after obviously offending her. "The outfit just seems a little ridiculous, but it should be good for today." He then left her to her work with out explaining the small packed kitchen. But luckily for Usagi her days in the kitchen would serve her more than she would have thought.

The constant drilling of utensils and techniques had her moving around the kitchen like a pro in no time and it was only in an hour that she was meditating and day dreaming while working. She lifted the dough onto the board and thought of how her life will be new and exciting from here on out. She thought of her independence and how this thing that seemed so impossible when she was twelve came from her so easily now that she was sixteen, and a woman.

She smiled now thinking of all the things she could do. After work she would find a small apartment with the money she had saved in her last years of working in the orphanage. She could lay out on the bed in her privacy and undress thinking of things she dared not think about while she lived with 7 other younger children.

She began to work furiously now thinking of such things and picturing that one night she could not get out of her head.

His breath was so warm against her skin and his fingers tickled her back, their eyes locked on each other. Maybe now she had a job he would stumble upon her and realize how independent she was and finally see her fit as… she shook the thought from her head quickly and got back to work.

The next few hours were spent throwing things around the oven and shaking her head every few moments to relieve herself of thoughts she found discomforting. Why he plagued her mind so eluded her, but it almost seemed cruel on his part to haunt her like this.

It seemed like only a few minutes before the boy came back telling her she was relieved for the day, she looked quickly outside and saw that the sky was a lovely dark tint of blue. She smiled and hung up her apron, walking out of the swinging door. "Don't you want to know when you come back tomorrow?" The boy was obviously impressed and she felt proud to know she had found a job on her first day.

She clutched her jacket close to her chest, her hands freezing in the cold. She was unsure where to begin, but when she walked a little ways out of the city there was a row of small apartments, "For Rent" signs held up in each sign by small lengths of yarn. She smiled and walked up in the same fashion she did at the bakery, thinking this was her secret to success.

She entered the first building and was greeted by a small woman, looking more like a raisin, sitting in a large rocking chair. She spoke a language under her breath and a small red sign asked Usagi to ring a bell. She pressed it lightly, then nervous that no one heard she pressed it again. "Hold on!" an angry male voice vibrated through the halls and for a second Usagi thought of running back to the orphanage and hiding in the bathtub, but she stood her ground.

A heavyset man ran down the stairs and stared down at Usagi and she felt like an ant, and her key to success did not last long when the man came closer and he smelled of raw onions and an old rice cake left in the sun. Her nose scrunched up for a second but she quickly wrapped her nose with her coat and pretended to cough.

The old man tilted his head to the side and coughed out "What do you want?" She only coughed once and pointed to the For Rent sign. He shook his head to tell her to follow him and she did. The stairs ached under her feet and the railings shook under the weight of her small hand so she tucked her digits back under her coat.

The room was small and unreasonably hot, but the price was right so she shook the man's hand and handed him money. She plopped down on her bed and felt herself begin to relax. She stared at her aching hands and smiled, not having felt this accomplished in her whole life.

Her fellow orphans thought she did not hear their scoffs and jabs, for the past month. Every time she walked into a room it was met with a sudden silence and a small giggle from a brave soul at the back of the room. She met them with a dumb smile and a stubborn heart. She would show them, change their minds about "little crybaby Usagi". They never said these things to her face of course. They were just heard through paper-thin walls and acoustic hallways.

She pushed these peoples' faces from her mind, scrunched up in shaming amusement. Instead she allowed other thoughts to softly push against the edges of her mind. She felt her hands become soft again and her chest become heavy. "I'll miss you," she doesn't quite remember if he said those words to her, in the blur of her buzz, but she knew he had felt it. These words kept her going through backbreaking work and the thought of his fingers lying on her shoulder allowed her body to shutter against the heat in her room, and she felt her body relax into the lumpy bed.

She did not say the words out loud, but spelled them with her fingers and then held them close to her chest, like a prayer. A name, she kissed her fingertips and spelled it again. A smile graced her slips and she spread her body wide and then contracted it quickly, wrapping her arms around her shoulders. Her body had no idea what to do with this energy, but when her hands were about to graze the bottom of her stomach, about to experiment, she heard a scream rip through the halls.


	4. Chapter 4

She sat up and felt her body shake and she reached for something that wasn't there. Confused she rushed into the hall.

A dark long limbed figure had just reached the other end of the hall, and Usagi lost her ability to breathe when she saw it's smiling red eyes. It lurched forward and began to laugh in a series of screeches. "We've been looking for you," it seemed to be a million whispers coming from every inch of the halls, breathing down her neck.

While Usagi stood still from shock the figure lurched closer and closer until it's long fingers wrapped around her neck. It's cold grip seemed to seep into her veins and stretched down her throat. It ripped through her chest and pushed tears through her eyes but when the pain wrapped around her heart she felt the pain quickly recede and a million screams filled her ears. The thing was in pain, she thought, and she hid her ears from the evidence wishing it would disappear.

When Usagi felt she could remove her hands, another even more disturbing feeling filled her chest. Everyone in the house was looking at her. The small man had returned with such anger in his eyes, and her body still weak she could do nothing but sit there.

The small woman from the entrance was now shaking a finger at her, screaming curses in a tongue that felt like drums against Usagi's ears. "Witch," was the last word heard before Usagi ran into her room and locked the door.

The pounds of a million fists seemed to stretch her thin wood door, and she could see the cracks forming in the thin brown word, so with the prowess of an orphan who had escaped her house more than a few times, she moved to the window, looking for a place to land.

She felt her body shake when she reached out her hands around the sill and let out a small scream when she swung her feet to rest on the railing outside. The door was caving in and she did not have time to check for the stability of all the things she relied on.

The loud crash, followed by millions of voices hit her ears like thunder, pushing her from the railing to land upon some thorny bushes. How quickly things could go wrong, she thought before standing and reaching her feet forward. The thorns tore at her mother's dress and she cried out, already weeping for the torn satin, but it was not long until the voices came streaming into the street, so she tore away from thousands of little captors and ran as fast as her feet could carry her, the wind catching and carrying away her tears.

At that moment very, far away, in a pitch-black room, a blind man saw a light. It was small at first but as the blind man watched eagerly it grew to the size of a small star and filled the room. At this, the bland man reached for a rope hanging from the ceiling, calling for his master.

Then poor Usagi, stood outside of her old home, miles away from the screams of terror and anger. Tears continued to stream from her eyes, but she made no sound as she edged around the property, watching the people inside.

They smiled through the windows, staring out at the chill, wrapped around each other in comfort. Her fists were balled and her legs began to shake, her body refusing to remain silent after the horrid ordeal it had been through.

It was when she felt most weak, when she began to run another direction, too scared to face those inside, the mocking faces pushing her feet forward in a fury. She didn't know where to go, but when her mind swam her body had clear intentions.

She came upon the lake, when it felt only moments had passed. She fell to her knees in the soft sand, her body now angry and rebellious against her need to keep moving. But still, with her fists balled Usagi pulled herself to the edge of the water, and laid her right cheek in the cool clear lake.

She used to joke that the water melted crystals, but now with her body weak at the edge that is exactly what it was. Her tears flowed into the lake and as the moon fell from the sky Usagi felt her body strengthen enough for her to extend her hands and stare at her reflection.

The woman who stared back at her was much older, but still had the look of a terrified six year old. Her eyes were wide and glossed over and while she could still lean on her arms she felt herself regress to a time when she was much younger. She would hold her mother's dress and with all her might say the words, "I wish I were a princess."

The words escaped her present day lips as her arms gave out from under her and face met the water with a splash. She fell unconscious and thus she did not notice the small light that fell from the corner of eye, and joined the reflection of the moon, and at that moment shot into the sky, to be mistaken as a falling star by anybody watching the sky at that moment.

And on his way to work, Mamoru had seen this shooting star, but instead of a sliver of hope, this sight suddenly made his knees get weak and his chest become tight. "Mamoru? Are you okay?" asked a coworker in a slightly worried tone, for now Mamoru was bent over in pain.

Mamoru ignored the concern and flung his dark hair out of his eyes and turned them back to the sky. The trail left by the shooting star gave him pause, and all of a sudden he had a terrible sight, one he couldn't remember a moment later, but had pushed him to fling his work sac to the side and begin to run. His lips moved around her name, but his chest could not say the word, for it was working too hard to get him to where she needed him to be.

Unlike the journey of the girl he feared for, his journey seemed to take centuries before he came upon the field of grass, too thick to see the lake in the center. He followed a traile through the reeds, remembering each step as if it was yesterday. When his feet met sand and his eyes saw a small white form, limp at the edge of the lake, he lunged forward landing next to her and lifting her gently out of the water.

His voice was caught in his throat, the sight before him was beautiful, her mouth slightly open and her eyes softly closed. She seemed to be at piece, but as he gazed down at her body and saw what had happened to her that day, the story told in bumps, bruises, and bleeding cuts, he was shaken out of his trance, and tried to do the same for her.

He shook her softly, whispering her name, "Usagi, please wake up." He took a break to listen to heart, and it was soft and slow, but still there. "Usagi, please please don't do this, please," he wiped the wet strands of hair from her face and leaned his ears next to her lips, she took shallow short breathes. He was thankful and in his relief he leaned his lips to her ears and whispered a name he only dared whisper once before, "Usako." And as if by magic the word caused Usagi to relax in his arms and curl against his chest. He lifted his knees cradling the girl and she softly murmured something against his chest, something he didn't catch due to his ears pounding from all his effort in the past half hour. But if he had heard he would know that when she dreamed she dreamed of "Mamo-chan".


	5. Chapter 5

When a few moments had passed and he was sure he could move with out hurting her, her stood with her in his arms and cradled her head against his chest. He took the train of her dress and wrapped it around his arm as not to drag it on the floor, smiling remembering her dancing with this dress when she was much younger. She was usually very light, he remembered from their childhood, but now she felt as if she was being pulled down by something, an extra weight had been added, he could not see where it could be.

He adjusted her and began to walk her away from the lake and flexed his arms under her weight, if his arms became sore he did not notice. He kept his eyes forward and his feet moving, keeping her chest at the bottom of his sight to make sure she was breathing.

She cooed softly and her breath was warm through his shirt, he became slightly unsettled by the sensation of her breath against his chest, but kept walking trying not to notice. He focused on being thankful that she was still breathing, and held her tighter against him and moved faster, so he could get her to safety.

Ten minutes into the walk, Mamoru began to wonder what had happened to her? Had someone tried to hurt her, or even worse had she been in the middle of an attack? Since he had been living in the city, he had learned that at night, humanity had become second in the food chain. Dark figures began to plague the city and they were ruthless and miserable to look upon.

The attacks had become less frequent, now that people knew that many of these creatures could not cross a threshold, and only came into the streets at night. But still a man or woman caught wondering at the wrong time could be caught in the grasp of what the locals called youma, demons that had taken souls of the streets when the night became too dark.

With this thought Mamoru had begun to run to his safe haven, he had faced one before, and had barely escaped with his life, and he did not know if he could survive with her cradling in his arms. And if anything were to happen to her…

He was glad to see the small gray brick building, quickly he lifted her up to her shoulder and swung the door open, rushing up the stairs, hoping no one would see him, keeping her location secret seemed important now. He came to his green door with no incident, the door swinging open silently into a chilled small room, a small twin bed taking up most of the room.

He laid her gently upon the ruffled bed, still warm from when he slept in it, just a few hours ago. Usagi's body seemed to notice and her body began to spread across it, releasing a soft smile across her face. He sat in the empty space between her splayed legs, her soft thigh revealed by the tear in her dress. He stared at it for a few moments, tracing the edges with his eyes, like he was staring at the lake he found her at, the one they had visited when they were younger.

And like the lake he began to imagine diving deep into the soft skin and he felt his hand reaching to graze it, like one might tip toe into a pool. But something inside him tilted his head up to see her sleeping face, now drooling from one side onto his pillow. He smiled and covered her leg with the remaining fabric. He stood readying to leave back to work, his boss would be cross but glad he showed up.

"Sleep well Usagi," and with a whisper he stole one last look and left the apartment to return in the morning, smiles returning to his face every few moments.


	6. Chapter 6

I do not own Sailor Moon

Please read and review

Returning from his job, his sac was once again light and his eyes pulled up to the cloudy cold sky. He began to strut towards his building, 30 minutes away, but never missing a step. Mamoru was so excited to be returning home, he still pictured her lying there resting, sprawled across his bed.

He caught himself running in excitement and quickly stopped as not to attract attention. Through his whole ten hour shift he thought of her, smiling as he came into his room. She would embrace him and… there were so many possibilities after that. When he realized he was only ten minutes away, judging by the bakery right around the corner, he found a happy medium between jogging and strolling. He took the four steps in front of his building two steps at a time. He was about to open the door when it came slamming to meet his face.

He fell back, having been literally knocked on his ass. When he looked up he saw a stream of blonde hair, falling from a large cap. Then the eyes came into focus. "Usagi?" his voice sounded far away, and his head became very dizzy. He was pulled slowly up and the apologetic smile made him feel even dizzier.

"I'm sorry Mamoru, I have to go to work," the blur of a woman stood still long enough for Mamoru's eyes to take her in. She wore a large button up shirt, framed with high-waisted pants from his closet and a pair of suspenders, barely holding them up. Right above her blue smiling eyes was a cap trying desperately to hold all her hair in. And as if some fate was hated and loved Mamoru at the same time, the clothes seem to register her curves and made Mamoru, think one last time of walking into his room and seeing her waiting there, ready to embrace him.

But before he could come back to reality her figure was fleeting into the distance, and he didn't know what made this time different, but he handed his sac to a near by neighbor and ran after her.

"Usagi," he called and instead of turning her head she kept running pretending not to hear him. When he had caught up to her, she only gave him a quick glance and kept running. "Mamoru I have to go," she said rushed, now refusing to look at him. "Usagi, please stop," he said and put his hand on her arm and she stopped instantly frozen, still refusing to look at him.

"Usagi, you were hurt last night, and I deserve to know why," he rushed out before he could think. She still refused to look at him but he saw her stillness as a good sign. He placed himself in front of her and before he could meet her eyes with his she tipped her head to the ground ad said, "I'm sorry that you saw me like that."

A silence hung between them, he now saw she was shaking and it seemed she was hardly standing. She broke the silence, "I never wanted you to see me like that." The sound of her voice was soft and sad and took control of Mamoru's body, reaching his hand under her chin.

"What happened?" he asked softly and their eyes locking sent a chill through both their bodies. This proved too much for both of them. Mamoru dropped his hand and Usagi began to walk again with out waiting for him.

There was a moment when the two were far enough away, that the distance caused their chests to tighten painfully, and emptiness dug through their stomachs, but one step past that the pain began to numb and they were able to continue to where they needed to go.

At that moment a handsome young prince stood outside of a building that looked shabby next to his fully white attire. He ignored his surroundings and when he spoke to the terrified owner, he did not look at him nor did he speak to him. The white haired prince simply heard the information and reentered his litter, four men lifting him and leaving.

Inside he sat smiling, no one able to see him. "I will soon have you princess," his words falling on the deaf ears of his servants and they continued into the city. He gripped a small pale pink pillow to his right and softly grazed it with his fingers, almost as one might a lover and then he gripped it tightly, if it had air to breathe it would have been strangled from it.

In the center of the littler, there was an image made of light displaying a sadly sleeping image, elegant and pale, with long yellow hair falling from two buns on top of her head.


	7. Chapter 7

I do not own sailor moon

Please r&r

"Usagi you're late," and "Usagi you should come out here, Now!" seemed only a few moments apart, and when she looked up at the clock she was right. "Motoki, if I leave now the dough…" she was not allowed to finish her sentence and instead was dragged out of her kitchen so fast her cap came free from her head, her hair spilling down her back.

She stared back at her dough, and was surprised when her small form came in contact with a much taller harder figure. She whipped her head around to see her roadblock and the most regal and cold black eyes sent a chill through the marrow in her spine tilting her head back in paralysis to stare longer. For a moment she felt cold iron bars pressed against her chest.

His smile was pleasant enough.

He had a few men behind him who kneeled at Usagi and her body began to back away for a moment, but the warm pale hand reached for hers, clasping it gently in his. And her heart fluttered, possibly not by her choice, but it still fluttered. She slid closer to him and he spoke his first words in front of commoners for the first time in years. "Princess, finally I have found you."

His warmth was overwhelming and she tipped her head back and allowed herself to be wrapped in his arms and his soft simple kiss. A smell of roses, arising from nowhere tore her lips from his and spilled a tear from her right eye. The prince ignored this and swung himself to her side and shouted to the people gathered, that he had found his princess and they would finally have a full kingdom, and all the while Usagi felt her feet pulled to a small building that held a lumpy bed, shared with a tall dark haired man.

She would not know this, but her prince now made note, that despite his best efforts he had gotten to her after she had made the connection, but he would break it soon enough.

She interrupted him quietly into his ear, afraid he would not hear over the roar, but she did not know he had trained himself to hear her voice from miles away, and this particular statement sounded if it came from a bell right over his head. "I have to see someone first," she did not know she had understood all the information until she told him the plans for her to move in would have to wait.

He nodded and smiled gently, hiding the anger, knowing she had to come willingly to his home, or she would never truly belong to him. "Whatever you need my princess and I will wait patiently for my new princess."

She also didn't remember hearing all the promises and proclamations from her "prince" until she had left his side for 20 feet. Then the words leaked from her mind and then into her exhausted body. The palace he promised was lined with security and warmth. It was filled with food and stuffed with all that life desired and required. She would never have to work.

There was also power that was promised, power that could save those she loved and cared for. She could save those she had left behind and change the world for so many, and she could destroy those dark things. Those things she had been hidden from and now bravely attacked her. When they could get a chance.

She could stay out here, in the cold, open to attack with no power. Or she could reside in the castle and let her power grow and spread through the town she grew up in. She could be a bird on wanton wings or be a powerful orb of light for the town to lay their heads under and thrive towards.

The choice seemed so simple, but her feet still inched towards the small building filled with a lumpy bed filled with a tall man who had dark black hair. Then she began to run, ripping herself slowly from the events of that afternoon, taking the four steps two steps at a time, after she was taking the four flights of stair four steps at a time. Then she stood at his door. It seemed too small for what was behind it.

She traced the edge of the door knob and then began to twist it, slowly. Then it jerked quickly the other way, and soon it was jerked from her fingers as the door pulled back revealing a bare chest, moist with water. She focused on a single moist droplet as to avoid swallowing the whole image.

"Usagi?" she pushed to the side of him and hid from his eyes by his bed staring down at the red blanket that only took a quarter of the bed. She hoped he had something larger to keep him warm at night.

Her hair was almost to her ankles, tangled in more than a thousand places from the wind catching it on her way here. He inched closer to her and only dared to get one foot away from her and stood there waiting.

They seemed to stand at opposite edges of a deep crack, reaching all the way to the middle of the earth. They stood there both thinking of their realities and their fantasies and they tried their hardest two merge these things together, but the crack only grew deeper. She turned around in one instant of unrecorded bravery. She stared into his deep blue eyes, closing the crack just an inch, but enough for her to grab her arm and pull her safely across against his chest.

She cooed softly against his chest, her worries and pain breathed out onto his chest in small soft songs. "He's gonna take me, I'm gonna save the world." She began to sob softly against his chest, and in confusion, he looked down upon and into her eyes. The weight of the past few moments fell on him then and he leaned his lips to hers. And instead of the crack closing, it spread through out the world and the earth was shattered and they both fell through nothing, wrapped in each other.

They said nothing and though the first few moments were filled with silence, the next few moments filled their heads with crushing questions. How would they survive the way their bodies wanted them to? How would they avoid the tragedy of true love in a world that grew in concrete and not living soil? They would both die before seeing the other sacrifice themselves to the other, working or weeping so the other one could survive.

They fell back onto the bed and she could feel his weight on top of her and she parted her lips but before he could dive deeper she said, "Please don't let me leave." He could have hated her, if he did not love her so much. She had ended the moment. And all that was left to them was to sleep separately in the same small bed, laying in the emptiness they had created with passion, their fear the only thing keeping them company now.


	8. Chapter 8

Both of them dreamed that night, of long marble floors, empty, and tall walls made of stone. Though it was night and they felt wind on their bodies, it was so warm and the two of them met eyes from across the room, the next moment they were in each other's arms.

They did not move their lips, but through soft grazes and tilts towards each other all thoughts were known. They knew that both of them had never been happier than this very moment, when their bodies were woven together in dance and there was no wide gape of reality keeping them apart. They stood together not faltering but gracefully floating on the marble.

She wore the dress, and he wore dark blue armor that matched the endless ocean in his eyes. She smiled and he smirked. She grazed his cheek and he held her waist firmly but with the gentility of a lover.

There was no band but the music tickled their ears and as they're smiles grew the music became faster and he lifted her high into the air and she cried out with her heart towards the ceiling. She bent her head down to stare into his big blue eyes. He lowered her slowly and the music became slow and they met their lips and felt like they were flying, meeting above the earth in a tight embrace, never moving their feet, for the knew if the stopped dancing the party would be over and they would land roughly on the ground.

But this was far from their minds as they moved across the floor and held each other tightly. He became tired first but he refuse to show it, smiling through the ache in his back. If he dropped his face, he would remember why the ache was there, and he would lose her.

The music continued to be slow and almost fleeting. They both knew if they could just keep the energy to dance swiftly across the floor they could stay there forever, no one to force them out. But she continued to trip and his head began to droop.

_We have to keep going, we must…_and he felt her become limp in his arms, he laid her on the ground hoping this would not end if he gave her a moment's rest. "Usagi you have to get up," she gave a weak nod in response but she fell to the floor and then she was gone. Turned into fog on the floor, and it left Mamoru alone to sway in the emptiness crying, and then he sat on a staircase and closed his eyes.

Both had dreamed, but only one awoke in his bed.

Mamoru quickly turned searching the emptiness for her form, but it was empty no matter where he looked. He stood, his chest bare against the cold, and the pain he had felt the day before when she ran to her bakery returned. But instead of standing and waiting for it to subside he ran to it, hoping it would stay because it meant she was still close enough to hurt him.

He ran down the halls of his building, down the stairs. He threw the door open and chased after nothing, following his chest and the pain that lied with in, until it was gone and he was left with an undying emptiness there, digging through his whole body. Watching as a small white carriage rode away from him into the city.

He ran back into his building and slammed his door and fell back to the bed and gave up. He just gave up, for how long he did not know.

She had given in as well, but she stood and walked through her surrender. Through cold hard walls she was told about the tragedy that was the infestation of youma. She was forced to recount her experience with the monster, still not greeted by the prince she had seen the day before, only met with a group of well trained men and women, fashionably dressed from head to toe.

They cooed and cawed at her like a pack of birds, fawning over her, making Usagi extremely uncomfortable, until finally she was lead to her room, asked to change her clothes, left alone. Instead of walking to the closet she sat on the bed and fell flat, weeping quietly.

Usagi turned on her right side, and Mamoru on his left, both reaching out for something that was no longer there. But both swore if they squinted and staid there between sleep and wakefulness they could see what they hoped to see, and lay just out of reach. This torture was their only comfort.


End file.
